Week 10 EOC: Lawyer Jokes!

How do you tell if it's REALLY cold outside?

A lawyer has his hands in his own pockets.

 What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.

 http://www.top10-best.com/l/top_10_best_lawyer_jokes.html

 

What's the difference between a lawyer and an onion?
You cry when you cut up an onion.

 

How many personal injury attorneys does it take to change a light bulb?

•Three - one to turn the bulb, one to shake him off the ladder, and the third to sue the ladder company.

http://brainden.com/lawyer-jokes.htm

 

Q. What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

A. There are skid marks in front of the skunk.

 

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

A. The lawyer charges more

http://www.wocka.com/13184.html

 Q: What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

A: They're both extinct.

 

Q: Know how copper wire was invented?

A: Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.

Week 9 EOC: Wall Street Journal Opinion

From a legal stand point Obamas newest “guideline” is a tad bit confusing to me. Recently Obama came to a conclusion and has decided to exempt Colorado and Washington of the “federal law “. In more simple terms, “The administration also issued new guidelines for all U.S. attorneys on the dynamic issue of marijuana law, recommending that they only focus on prosecuting major cases”. This is targeted to the issue of marijuana in those states because these states have legalized the drug, though that still means it is not covered by federal law. I for one don’t believe the legalization is the worst thing that could happen but in a technical sense it is still not legalized! Yes, Colorado and also Washington have legalized it in there state but at the end of the day our president is the one who could truly... (to be cont.)

Prosecutorial resources aren't unlimited, and some crimes deserve more enforcement attention than others.

Because after the November referenda Democrats introduced legislation to exempt Colorado and Washington states from federal marijuana law. Under the Constitution Congress can't pass laws that apply in some states and not others.

Not since Nixon have we seen a Presidency so disdainful of the law, but at least Nixon had enough respect for legal appearances to break the law on the sly

 

Mr. Obama told Walters that while "the federal government has a lot to do when it comes to criminal prosecutions... it does not make sense from a prioritization point of view to for us to focus on recreational drug users in a state that has already said under state law that's legal."

Your Own Arguments and Opinions

In terms of did i agree or disagree with the rulings i felt as though i agreed and understood all of the information given to me within this project. I was able to communicate with source that i can use as resources in time to come and was opened up to a new side of information pertaining to my future business. The questions i was able to get answers to helped me learn many things i was unaware of and these are things i need to become the business savvy women i am striving to be. I believe that all the information i was given will help me build a business that will withstand the test of time. In my opinion with the help of a good attorney you can really make a business last, though it does depend on what kind of attorney they really are, legally and morally, I don't think there is a perfect or completely trustworthy attorney but i believe there is the right one out there for all businesses you just have to take your time and search for he or she. Overall i think when it comes to being a business owner it is crucial to do what we did in this project and that is to get out and use your resources, and ask the questions you need to know, because nobody has got your back but yourself, and you need to make sure you are a step ahead of the rest or at least knowledgeable in what you're doing, because they're will be many who want to see you fail.

Rule of Law

Information to come. Final Project.

Reasoning of the Law

The thought process i feel my lawyer went through was very straight forward, he was not someone who spoke around the questions or didn't stick to the point. Every question i asked he didn't go into hour long answers he gave me the answers i needed and that what i appreciated about the conversation the most. He was very direct and for most people that's hard to do, i know i am someone who strays off topic a lot but ironically i prefer when others keepitsimple and to the point. If i could categorize Daniels answers that is exactly how i would pin point it, "short and sweet". I think most people strive to have a thinking process like that, i know i do. Its very rare that someone so full of knowledge does not over do it and talk your ear off. Daniel had the correct mentality for my project, answer my questions, and kept it simple to understand!

The Questions

How can I protect the name of my business?

"One of the best ways to protect your businesses name is to obviously trademark the name, what would be the smartest thing to do is register your business name with the state, they will issue you something called an EIN number and that will ensure local businesses are not allowed to use your businesses name."

 What are my risks of being sued?

"There will honestly always be a chance someone may come after your business legally, it all rests on how the business is being managed and your competitors. The chance is always there, that is why you must always have someone in your corner legally, a great lawyer is key to maintaining a good reputation."

What do I have to do to get a loan for my business?

"Going about getting a business loan is about the same as any other loan, but most importantly you need a strong business plan, if the lenders feel your business is profitable, you may then have your loan."

What kind of insurance policy will I need?

"Fire, Liability, auto, and worker"

What kind of registration and licenses are required to start my business?

"You will need a local business license, this will ensure you meet any zoning laws, codes, and a variety of regulations. It is also very important you get familiar with business taxes, and they're are kits that can help you with that."

How much money will i need to get started?

"You want enough money to cover all of your expenses, hiring an accountant is key in this area"

Are there any grants available for my start-up business?

"It is very rare that there are grant given out for businesses."

If I'm thinking of starting a business, what should I do first?

"First and foremost ak yourself if you truly have what it takes, and if you are pasionate about the business, those are key to success"

How do I know I'm choosing a smart "business opportunity"?

"You must ask yourself a couple things, and the most important questions as a business owner would be does this oppurtinty benfit your company, and you want to make sure this venture would not lead to any loss in investments."

What happens if my business takes off suddenly or tanks?

"You can never be sure of something like those things happening, which is why you need an attorney by your side so that they can help prevent situations taking a turn for the worse"

Legal Authority

I found my lawyer through my mother. He is a professor who now teaches a criminal justice course and used to be a practicing lawyer. I thought he'd be a great choice because when i asked him a few practice questions he didn't ask me to go away, that was good enough for me! I was nervous any lawyer i would speak to wouldn't take me seriously so i figured Daniel was my best bet and i was right, he was more than helpful and answered my questions in full detail. Daniel took me very seriously and even gave me a few tips on owning a business, and said he would be more than happy to answer any future questions i had. Daniel was a great choice and i couldn't imagine working with anyone else, he didn't have that "lawyer" attitude, he was very open and we shared great conversation, and i wasn't charged for any of it!